I was looking at either changing careers or having some new direction within the organization. I hadn’t framed how I wanted to do that or what I might want to do going forward, but I told Sharon that I thought it might be helpful to talk through my alternatives with someone who could offer advice and direction and could begin to help me put some form around what I imagined to be future opportunities.

For the most part over my career span, which has extended some four decades, I set my career objectives myself. I don’t typically share with anyone what my deep innermost thoughts are, particularly as it relates to my career, and never have. Executive coaching certainly didn’t fit with the sort of things I had grown up with developmentally as a corporate person. So I had some reluctance about opening up about career direction.

But I realized in looking back that I had run into some hurdles along the way, some of which had to do with maybe misreading the person on the other side of the table. I had some early discussion with Sharon about what I thought were some past confrontational circumstances that were aggravated and escalated by virtue of my believing the other person had taken an adversarial position. She was very helpful in making certain that I didn’t go there in my current circumstance.

Sharon and I would talk through things that I had felt or that I was seeing, and then we would talk through whether they were actually happening – was there something confrontational taking place – and if so, how might I best deal with it. These were all the sorts of things I generally never talk about. The way I was brought up in the for-profit finance world, sharing this sort of thing was viewed as a potential weakness, and it enabled somebody who was seeking the same thing you were to gain a competitive advantage. So for me there was lots of unlearning certain kinds of behavior, opinions, reactions, and then re-learning a different approach.

My life in the nonprofit sector in finance is very different from what my life had been in large for-profit corporations. Sharon comes from the nonprofit sector, so I learned a lot from her. I find it very helpful to share with her the path I’m taking and what I see 12 months out, and various ways to accomplish that while building relationships. This has allowed me to craft a direction that otherwise might have taken a very different kind of detour.

Working with Sharon has helped me to trust people more often and at a different level. And I clearly have a better work-life balance. There are certain burdens I just feel I don’t carry any more – I can kind of unleash and let go. Because I don’t let it all get to me, I’m having more fun!

I’m enjoying this time again. That’s meaningful. Because literally, I’m enjoying my time here again, and I did not think that was possible. I give Sharon great credit for that.

I can pretty much talk to Sharon about anything. She listens well. And her feedback is good. It isn’t exactly advice, because we come to a lot of conclusions together, and I like that.

Be prepared for the frankness. It’s tough having someone tell you about yourself! But in the end, it will make you a lot happier. And I would equate that with fun. I would say, if you aren’t having fun, you’ll learn to have fun again.

A Senior Executive of For-profit and Nonprofit Institutions

Northeast United States